How do you introduce yourself?
a) My name is so and so, and I like writing.
b) My name is so and so, and I want to make Malhar memorable.
c) My name is so and so, and I’m looking for a different and awesome Malhar this year.
d) My name is so and so, and I can drink a litre of milk in one minute.
Why are you applying to this department?
a) Writing is my passion.
b) My name is so and so, and I want to make Malhar memorable.
c) I believe I am an intellectual who likes to discuss the burning issues of the day.
d) Err, I heard you guys have a hot quota...
During your interview, you
a) Tell a story.
b) Say “My name is so and so, and I want to make Malhar memorable.”
c) Realise that Conclave doesn’t take volunteers.
d) Vomit all over you interviewers.
Your secret is...
a) That the story is about you.
b) That your name is so and so, and you want to make Malhar memorable.
c) That you don’t know what MDGs are.
d) That you’re applying in the hope of seeing the OC smile.
What is your happy place?
a) Comps room.
b) Happy place? Um, my name is so and so, and I want to make Malhar memorable.
c) Abdul Kalam’s office.
d) Wherever you can find switchboards.
If you have answered...
Mostly As – You are made for the Raga. Unfortunately, applications are shut.
Mostly Bs – Your name is so and so, and you want to make Malhar memorable. Supernova Souvenirs is the place for you.
Mostly Cs – Today is the last day for Conclave registrations. Run!
Mostly Ds – You seem to live your life with the motto ‘Jo jeeta wohi Sikander’. Texxx is the place for you.
