1. How would you describe your relationship with Dr. Batra?
a) Batra who?
b) He’s an acquaintance.
c) We are close friends.
d) We see each other so often, people think we’re a couple.
2. Your nightmares:
a) Cause you to tear your hair out.
b) Are centred on hair fall.
c) Involve Dr. Batra.
d) Are interrupted by you coughing because you choked on the hair on your pillow.
3. How frequent are your TV appearances?
a) I try to be seen every cricket match, but it hasn’t worked so far.
b) I appear in the background in some ads.
c) I’ve never been on TV.
d) People are blinded by my shiny scalp.
4. When you are sick, what do you cough up?
a) I usually have a dry cough.
b) Phlegm.
c) Blood.
d) Hair ball.
5) What does your barber say when you go to the saloon?
a) He compliments your hair.
b) He talks about how you’re getting a little thin on the top.
c) He says he's going to charge you extra for finding the hair to cut.
d) He automatically gives you a shave.
6. What shampoo do you use?
a) Garnier, Clinic All Clear, Pantene etc.
b) Mediker.
c) Hair growth shampoo.
d) Scalp polisher and cleaner.
If you have answered...
Mostly As – You are barely bald. Don’t worry, yet.
Mostly Bs – You are reasonably bald. It’s a degenerative disease. Ah, to be young and hairy.
Mostly Cs – You are rather bald. Soon, you will be at the pinnacle of balditude.
Mostly Ds – You are bald. Totally and comprehensively. Stop taking these quizzes (you won't get a different answer) and go buy a wig.
